Running Downhill previews Lollapalooza, Day Two, Saturday, August 2nd.
There are many reasons not to go to Lollapalooza this year (or any other year for that matter). There’s the obvious, which includes the horrible late July/early August Chicago heat and humidity, high ticket prices ($205 for the weekend!), bad and expensive beer (bud light, great job), piss poor outdoor festival sound, too many people (e.g. Len Kasper, Wrigleyville residents), and of course, the lineup itself. There’s also its function as a primary (and most disgusting) example of corporate capitalism run amok (y’all goin to see Rage Against The Machine on the AT&T stage lol). Here’s what we think of the Saturday groups.
Now of course we’re aware that any sort of coverage is its own form of promotion (whether or not we’re not going and think it sucks), but such is the uphill battle of trying to be humorous jerks. Since this feature has very little integrity, hopefully this is as snarky we get, and in the future promise to try and provide actual, thought provoking, insightful, and somewhat coherent/intelligent criticism. In the meantime, Running Downhill presents:
An Incomplete and Shallow Band Preview of Lollapalooza, Saturday, August 2nd
Does It Offend You, Yeah? (12:30-1:30, Bug Light Stage)
BK: Yeah, your retarded band name offends me.
TH: I agree. Really bad name. Bad enough that I don’t care what you sound like.
EM: Apparently their name is a Ricky Gervais The Office reference. So, uh, yeah, whatever, “You havin’ a laugh?”
Explosions in the Sky (4:30-5:30, Bud Light Stage)
EM: As a good friend of mine once put it, the problem with this band is that they make boring people think their life is epic. The next thing you know snare roll buildups and repetitive Austin-delay-pedal riffs are turning your trip to the grocery store into The Odyssey, and that’s just all fucked up.
Broken Social Scene (6:30-7:30, Bud Light Stage)
EM: Is it just me or is Lollapalooza 2008 made up of bands who played at Intonation/Pitchfork in 2005 and 2006? Going hand in hand, of course, is that mid-2000s trend of having like ten million people on stage playing a bunch of insignificant instruments/microphones. I don’t care how many tracks they’re on on your record, it’s going to sound like bullshit in Grant Park.
Wilco (8:30, Bud Light Stage)
EM: The world would be better off if non-member (and local genius) Jim O’Rourke would have fired all of Wilco back in 2001. Snooze.
TH: I think I liked Yankee Hotel Foxtrot in 2002. Yes. Yes, I did. Man, that was…six years ago.
Okkervil River (5:30-6:30, PlayStation 3 Stage)
EM: Funny how the worst band (i.e. Okkervil River) on a great record label (i.e. Jagjaguwar) ends up playing the biggest music festival in Chicago.
TH: I like “Red.” Can’t say much past that.
EM: You’d better not.
Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings (7:30-8:30, PlayStation 3 Stage)
BK: This is the real deal. Nobody’s made soul music like this since Detroit had jobs. Too bad it will be completely lost on everyone who came to see all the bands with misspelled names.
TH: Yep. These guys are truly, truly, truly good, live or on record. “Nobody’s Baby” might be the first legitimate R&B track in 30 years.
EM: Whatever you guys say.
Witchcraft (12:00-12:30, Citi Stage)
EM: Swedish metalheads obsessed with Pentagram and Roky Erikson, playing Sabbath riffs till you melt. I wouldn’t miss this, unless it costs $85+ and was in Grant Park. Save your bills and see them on Saturday night at the new Bottom Lounge w/ Indian.
TH: How did these guys get forced to stand in the sun all day at this festival? Clearly, they belong somewhere else, like the Bottom Lounge, where it’s dark.
Battles (6:30-7:30, Citi Stage)
EM: People who like this band like to pretend that they sound kind of like Rush, when in reality they sound like a bunch of relentless guitar tapping wankers.
Dr. Dog (1:30-2:30, MySpace Stage)
EM: At work one day, I went to the Apple Store to get something fixed. While there, there was a band playing. This band had entirely too many members, the singer reminded me way too much of the dudes in high school who like OAR and Dave Matthews Band, and their sound was so jumbled and crappy that endearing critics would most likely give them some sort of mushy compliment like, “they defy genre!” This band was Dr. Dog, and their probably the 100th most interesting band to come out of Philadelphia in the last 15 years.
TH: Oh, Marsh, it’s not that bad. First of all, they have two singers, one of which is clearly superior to the other. Second of all, they’re one of the few bands who has a solid mid-fi sound down. Thirdly, they’re almost completely derivative of all genres, hence, they don’t “defy” genre so much as embrace it. Fourthly, although they don’t suck, they may signal the musical apocalypse (a subject to be further discussed in an upcoming post on their new record). And what’s an “endearing critic”, exactly?
MGMT (3:30-4:30, MySpace Stage)
BK: Am I supposed to call this band “M-G-M-T” or “Management,” as in notes left on employee lounge refrigerators? Maybe I’ll just call them “not interested.”
Toadies (7:30-8:30, MySpace Stage)
EM: Note: If I’m not going to go see Mission to Burma, Sebadoh, or Public Enemy rehash some jams from 20 years ago at Pitchfork Festival, I sure as hell am not going to see Toadies.
TH: I think Rage should just cover “Possum Kingdom,” except change all the words, and the Toadies should probably just watch.
BK: Remember their torture-porn video?
EM: They were ahead of the curve. Take that, Eli Roth!
Brand New (4:30-5:30, AT&T Stage)
EM: I thought we (i.e. society) were all ready to forget about 2001-2003. Apparently not. Pop-punk lives, somewhere (i.e. the AT&T stage at Lollapalooza), I guess.
Rage Against The Machine (8:30, AT&T Stage)
BK: If these guys were that pissed off during the Clinton years, what the fuck now? By the way, way to stop being America’s most recognizable politically outspoken band when shit goes south. We’re left with the question: would Ohio have been a blue state in 2004 if there had been a new Rage record for Cincinnati metal-billies to listen too?
EM: I heard that Zack De La Rocha hip-hop album was dropping soon! Don’t sleep!